Trying to do everything yourself isn't a sign of strength. It’s a recipe for burnout.
I know because I’ve been there. For years, I believed that if I wanted something done right, I had to do it myself. I applied this broken logic to everything from my work projects to my personal life. It was the same mindset that kept me trapped in unhealthy habits for far too long. I thought I had to white-knuckle my way through every craving and every challenge all on my own.
It took losing over 110 pounds and completely rebuilding my routines to understand a simple but powerful truth: you can't grow if you don't let go. Real strength isn’t about doing everything yourself. It’s about learning to trust others, focus your energy where it matters most, and build a team, whether at home or at work.
Learning to delegate was one of the hardest and most rewarding skills I ever developed. It’s what allows me to focus on deep work, run my business, and still have a life. It’s a game-changer. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, stretched thin, and stuck, I want to share the steps that helped me master this art.
1. Acknowledge the Real Reason You Don't Delegate
Before you can get good at delegating, you have to be honest with yourself. Why do you avoid it? For me, it was fear. Fear that someone would mess up. Fear that it would take longer to explain the task than to just do it. But underneath all that was a prideful fear that if someone else did a great job, it would somehow diminish my own value. We have to get over that. Delegating isn’t admitting defeat. It's an act of leadership and trust.
2. Start with the Small, Low-Stakes Stuff
You don’t hand over your most critical project on day one. Start small. Think about the repetitive, time-consuming tasks that drain your energy but don't require your unique expertise.
This could be things like:
- Organizing your digital files.
- Scheduling appointments.
- Doing initial research on a topic.
- Managing a social media account.
These are perfect training grounds. They allow you to practice the process of delegating while the risk is low.
3. Match the Task to the Talent
Don’t just hand a task to the first available person. Think about who is best suited for it. Who has the skills? More importantly, who might actually enjoy it or find it a good growth opportunity? When you give someone a task that aligns with their strengths or interests, they’re more likely to be engaged and do a fantastic job. It becomes a win for both of you.
4. Explain the "Why" Not Just the "What"
This is a step most people skip. Don't just give instructions. Give context. When someone understands why a task is important and how it fits into the bigger picture, they feel a sense of purpose. They are no longer just checking a box. They are a valued contributor to a meaningful goal. This connection to purpose is a powerful motivator.
5. Be Clear About What "Done" Looks Like
Ambiguity is the enemy of good delegation. Be crystal clear about your expectations. Don't just say, “Can you handle the report?” Instead, say, “I need a two-page summary of last quarter's sales figures by Friday at 3 PM. Please include a chart showing the top three products.” When you clearly define the finish line, you give the other person a clear target to aim for.
6. Give Them the Keys to the Car
Delegating a task without giving the necessary authority is one of the most frustrating things you can do to someone. If they need access to certain files, make sure they have it. If they need to contact a client, give them your blessing to do so. You are giving them responsibility, so you must also give them the ownership and authority to get the job done right.
7. Provide the Tools and Support
Don't assume they have everything they need. Ask a simple question: “What do you need from me to be successful with this?” They might need a software password, a contact’s phone number, or just the assurance that they can ask you a question if they get stuck. Setting them up for success is setting yourself up for success.
8. Get Out of the Way
This is the hardest part. Once you've delegated, you have to actually let go. Resist the urge to hover over their shoulder or constantly check in. Micromanaging sends a clear message: “I don’t trust you.” It crushes morale and defeats the entire purpose of delegating. Trust the person you chose. Trust the process you created.
9. Check In, Don't Take Over
Stepping back doesn't mean disappearing. The best approach is to schedule brief, specific check-ins. You could agree to a quick chat midway through the project or ask for a brief email update at the end of the day. This provides support and accountability without turning into micromanagement. It’s a way to ensure things are on track while still respecting their ownership of the task.
10. Give Credit Where It's Due
When the task is complete, and they've done a good job, acknowledge it. A simple, sincere “Thank you, you did a great job on this” can make all the difference. Publicly giving credit is even more powerful. It builds confidence, reinforces good work, and makes people eager to help you again in the future. It fosters a culture of mutual respect and appreciation.
Delegation isn't just about freeing up your time. It's about empowering others. It's about building trust. And it's about focusing your God-given energy on the work only you can do.
So, here's my challenge to you: What is one small, low-stakes task you can hand off this week? Just one.
Start there, and see what happens.
