I used to think "go with the flow" meant giving up. Just drifting. Letting life push you wherever it wanted.
Then life hit me hard—and I realized it actually takes strength to surrender.
If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed when things don’t go as planned, I get it. I’ve been there, too. Losing over 110 pounds, breaking free from destructive habits like binge eating, smoking, and addictive gaming—I used to fight against everything. Control was my safety blanket.
But I learned (slowly and painfully) that surrender isn’t weakness. It’s wisdom. And learning to flow instead of forcing everything changed my life.
Here are 12 practical steps you can take to start doing the same.
1. Accept What You Can’t Control
Let’s be real. So much of what we stress about is out of our hands. Traffic. Other people’s opinions. Unexpected delays.
When I was trying to lose weight, I would spiral anytime I hit a plateau. I’d obsess over the scale, panic that I was failing. Until finally, I realized the only thing I control is the effort I put in each day.
You can’t control everything. But you can control how you respond.
Take a breath. Accept the moment.
2. Focus on the Present
Worry lives in the future. Regret lives in the past. Peace lives right now.
Going with the flow means letting go of tomorrow’s fears and yesterday’s mistakes.
One thing that helped me? Gratitude. Every morning, I’d list three simple things I was thankful for—hot coffee, a strong body, another chance to try. It grounded me in the present, and it still does.
3. Trust the Process
Life isn’t linear. Progress isn’t smooth.
When I started waking up at 5 a.m. to write, my brain felt like mush. But I showed up anyway—in short bursts of deep work. Slowly, things shifted. New habits formed. Ideas flowed.
You don’t have to see the whole path. Just take the next step in faith.
God has a plan. Trust it, even when it’s messy.
4. Let Go of Perfection
Perfection is a trap. It keeps you stuck. I used to think if I couldn’t do it perfectly, I shouldn’t do it at all. That mindset delayed my growth for years.
You don’t need a flawless morning routine or a perfect diet. You just need a small, honest effort.
Consistency beats perfection every time.
5. Listen More
When you're always chasing control, it's easy to tune everything else out.
But when I started slowing down and actually listening—to others, to my own thoughts, to God—I began to see things more clearly. Answers came when I stopped trying to force them.
Listen with intention. You’ll be surprised what shows up.
6. Practice Saying “Yes” and “No”
Going with the flow isn’t about saying yes to everything. It's learning what to welcome and what to gently turn away.
When I had more clarity in my priorities, I started saying no more often—to toxic relationships, junk food, and distractions.
At the same time, I said yes to spontaneous hiking trips, moments of prayer, and unexpected chances to serve others. Let your yes be joyful and your no be peaceful.
7. Let Yourself Feel
Sometimes we fight emotions like sadness, anger, or anxiety because we don’t want to feel weak. But resisting feelings only makes them louder.
Going with the flow means feeling things without judgment. There were days in my journey—especially early on—where I just broke down. And that was okay. Allowing myself to grieve what I was letting go of made room for healing.
Feel it. Don’t fear it.
8. Find Movement, Not Rigidity
Routine is great—until it boxes you in. I found freedom in flexible routines. Like working in short, focused 2–4 hour deep work sessions instead of pushing through long, exhausting days.
Ask yourself, “What’s working?” Adjust what isn’t. Flow is movement. Not stiffness.
9. Breathe on Purpose
Deep breaths are a built-in reset button. When I feel tense or off-course, I pause and take three long breaths.
It’s simple, but it pulls me back to myself. It reminds me that I’m alive. That I can choose peace.
Try it right now. Inhale slowly. Hold. Exhale fully. Do it again.
10. Journal Through the Chaos
Writing helps process your thoughts and emotions. When my mind feels like a tornado, I journal. Not anything fancy—just brain dumps. Whatever’s in my head, I put on paper.
It makes space. Things start to make sense. Solutions often show up while I’m writing.
Don’t overthink it. Just write.
11. Let Your Faith Guide You
When life got too heavy, I turned fully to God. My Christian Orthodox faith became a lifeline, not just a routine.
During hard seasons, I started reading Scripture more. Spending early mornings in quiet prayer. I stopped trying to carry everything alone.
God’s grace became the flow. His Spirit became the guide.
If you’re struggling, lean into your faith. Let it hold you up.
12. Celebrate the Small Wins
This one might be the most underrated. Going with the flow doesn’t mean floating aimlessly—it means celebrating where the current takes you.
Every healthy meal, every walk, every time you choose peace instead of panic—those wins add up. That’s how I lost over 110 pounds. One choice at a time.
So pause. Smile. Say, “That was a step forward.” Then keep going.
You’re Stronger Than You Think
Surrender isn’t weakness. It’s brave.
Going with the flow doesn’t mean giving up—it means learning to move through life with trust, grace, and strength.
Try one step from this list today. Just one. Maybe it’s a deep breath. Maybe it’s saying no. Maybe it’s writing down one thing you're grateful for. Whatever it is, let it be simple. Let it be real.
And ask yourself this: What would happen if I stopped fighting everything and started flowing through it instead?
You might just find a whole new kind of freedom waiting⏤one that feels lighter, more joyful, and deeply grounded in who you are and what truly matters.
You're not alone in this.
We're flowing forward, together.
