20 Quotes About Understanding and Empathy

I used to think empathy was all fluff—until I realized it was the one thing that healed my relationships, my self-worth, and even my bad habits.

When you're trying to change your life, whether it's breaking free from addiction, losing weight, or finding your purpose, understanding and empathy are lifelines. Not just from others, but from yourself too. You can't grow while beating yourself up. And you can't truly connect with others if you don’t try to understand where they’re coming from.

Empathy isn’t weakness. It’s strength with heart.

Why Understanding and Empathy Matter

Let’s get real. You can't walk this life alone. You need connection, support, grace. If you’re constantly judging yourself or others, that connection breaks. I’ve lived it. When I was binge-eating, smoking, and drowning my evenings in video games and alcohol, I was also isolating myself. I didn’t want anyone to see how far I’d fallen.

But once I let myself feel—really feel—my emotions and other people’s pain, things shifted. I stopped numbing. I started listening. First to others, then to myself. That’s when healing started.

Understanding teaches you patience.

Empathy lets you show up, even when it’s hard.

And sometimes, the thing you need most is someone who just gets it—without fixing, judging, or rushing you. So I’m sharing 20 quotes that helped me do just that. I hope they spark something in you.

20 Quotes About Understanding and Empathy

You don’t need to read these all at once. Let them sink in. Reflect on the ones that touch your heart.

  1. “Empathy is seeing with the eyes of another, listening with the ears of another, and feeling with the heart of another.” – Alfred Adler

  2. “We think we listen, but very rarely do we listen with real understanding, true empathy.” – Carl Rogers

  3. “Whenever you are about to find fault with someone, ask yourself the following question: What fault of mine most nearly resembles the one I am about to criticize?” – Marcus Aurelius

  4. “I do not ask the wounded person how he feels, I myself become the wounded person.” – Walt Whitman

  5. “No one cares how much you know, until they know how much you care.” – Theodore Roosevelt

  6. “Try to understand men. If you understand each other, you will be kind to each other.” – John Steinbeck

  7. “Empathy is not agreement. It’s acknowledgment.” – Brené Brown

  8. “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle you know nothing about.” – Ian Maclaren

  9. “The great gift of human beings is that we have the power of empathy.” – Meryl Streep

  10. “Understanding is the first step to acceptance, and only with acceptance can there be recovery.” – J.K. Rowling

  11. “The highest form of knowledge is empathy.” – Bill Bullard

  12. “Sometimes we just need someone to simply be there. Not to fix anything, but to let us feel that we’re not alone.”

  13. “If we can share our story with someone who responds with empathy and understanding, shame can't survive.” – Brené Brown

  14. “Listening is where love begins. Listening to ourselves and then to our neighbors.” – Fred Rogers

  15. “Speak to people with kindness. The echo will always return.”

  16. “What makes us human is not our mind but our heart. Not our ability to think but our ability to love.” – Henri Nouwen

  17. “Empathy is a choice. A vulnerable choice.” – Brené Brown

  18. “We cannot judge other people’s choices without understanding their reasons.” – Unknown

  19. “Before you speak, let your words pass through three gates: Is it true? Is it necessary? Is it kind?” – Rumi

  20. “The real test of empathy is not in feeling for someone we agree with. It’s in understanding someone we don’t.” – Stephen Montagne

Okay, I slipped one of mine in there. But that quote came from a real moment. I had reached a point where I was just sick of the blame game—blaming politicians, family, toxic friends, even God. Then I looked in the mirror. I stopped blaming and started listening.

That’s when real change began.

How to Practice Empathy in Everyday Life

Empathy isn’t some magical personality trait you're born with. It’s a practice. A muscle. You can build it with daily effort. Here’s how:

  • Pause before reacting. Especially when emotions are high. Take a breath and ask, “What’s really going on here?”
  • Ask open questions. Instead of judging someone’s behavior, ask, “What led you to that decision?”
  • Listen without fixing. Don’t try to solve problems immediately. Just hear them out. Let them know they’re not alone.
  • Reflect back. Say things like, “It sounds like you felt overwhelmed when that happened” to show you understand.
  • Check your ego. Not every conversation is about being right. Sometimes just being there is enough.

A Personal Story: Empathy Changed My Inner Dialogue

When I weighed over 330 pounds, I wasn’t just unhealthy. I was cruel—to myself. Every time I slipped up, I’d call myself names I wouldn’t say to another human being.

But when I learned empathy, the voice changed.

Instead of “You’re disgusting,” I started saying, “You slipped. But you're trying. Let’s do better tomorrow.”

That shift helped me lose 110 pounds. Not by self-hate. By self-compassion.

Empathy didn’t just change how I saw others. It saved me from myself.

Try This Today

Next time someone frustrates you, pause. Don’t react. Ask yourself:

What pain might they be carrying?

And maybe—just maybe—ask the same thing about yourself.

Because some of the hardest people to forgive are the ones closest to home. And that includes you.

Final Thoughts

Empathy doesn’t mean you let people walk over you. It means you choose to see people as human, flawed, and worthy—just like you.

If you’re struggling to change, grow, forgive, or connect, try leading with understanding. It won’t always be easy, but it will always be worth it.

Pick one of these quotes, write it down, and put it somewhere you’ll see it this week. Let it remind you: the heart grows stronger when it learns to feel.

You don’t have to be perfect.

You just have to care.

So which quote speaks to you most right now? Let that be your compass today.

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