Ever feel like a habit has started to call the shots in your life? Like you’re not quite in the driver's seat anymore? It’s a unsettling feeling and one I know all too well. If you’re wondering if something in your life has crossed the line from a simple habit to something more like a struggle with addiction you’re in the right place. We’re going to talk about it openly and honestly friend to friend.
Recognizing the signs is the very first step toward finding freedom. And trust me freedom is possible. I’ve been in the trenches with things like gaming addiction binge eating and other unhealthy habits that felt impossible to break. But step by step things can change.
So let’s gently explore some common signs. See if any of these resonate with you. There's no judgment here only understanding.
You Keep Doing It More Than You Mean To
Ever tell yourself "just one more episode" or "just 15 more minutes of gaming" and then hours disappear? Or maybe you planned to have just one drink or one cookie and it turns into many more. This feeling of using more of a substance or engaging in a behavior for longer than you intended is a big one. It’s like a promise you make to yourself that you can’t quite keep when it comes to this specific thing.
For me this was huge with gaming. I’d sit down for a quick session after work and suddenly it would be 2 AM. My intentions were good but my control wasn't.
It Takes Over Your Thoughts
Do you find yourself thinking about the substance or behavior a lot? Maybe you’re planning when you can next indulge or reliving past moments. It might even distract you from what you’re doing at work or with family. When something occupies that much mental real estate it’s a sign it has a significant hold.
You Need More to Get the Same Effect
Remember when a little bit was enough? If you find you now need more of the substance or more intense engagement in the behavior to get the same feeling you used to get that’s tolerance. It’s your body and mind adapting making it harder to feel satisfied with less.
Important Things Get Pushed Aside
Are hobbies relationships work or school suffering because of this habit? Maybe you’re skipping family dinners to engage in the behavior or your performance at work is dropping. When the pursuit of this one thing starts to crowd out the other important parts of your life it’s a clear warning sign.
I remember when my health took a backseat to binge eating. Exercise things I enjoyed doing with friends they all faded because my focus was elsewhere. It was a tough realization that led to me eventually losing over 110 pounds but first I had to see the problem.
You Feel Bad When You Try to Stop
If you try to cut back or stop do you experience unpleasant physical or emotional feelings? This could be anything from irritability anxiety and restlessness to physical discomfort. These are often called withdrawal symptoms and they can make it incredibly hard to quit.
You Spend a Lot of Time on It
This isn't just about the time spent doing the behavior but also the time spent getting ready for it obtaining what you need for it and recovering from its effects. If a significant chunk of your day revolves around this one thing it's definitely taking up too much space.
You Keep Going Despite Knowing It's Causing Problems
This is a tough one. You might see the negative impacts on your health relationships finances or general wellbeing but you continue anyway. The logical part of your brain knows it's not good but the urge or compulsion feels stronger. It’s a frustrating cycle. I knew binge eating was making me unhealthy and unhappy but stopping felt impossible for a long time.
You've Tried to Quit Before But Couldn't
Have you made serious attempts to stop or cut down but found yourself unable to stick with it? Many people try multiple times before they find what works. It doesn’t mean you’re weak; it means the addiction has a strong grip. Each attempt is a learning experience though.
You Hide It or Lie About It
Do you find yourself being secretive about the behavior? Maybe you downplay how much you’re doing it or hide it from loved ones because you feel ashamed or anticipate their disapproval. This secrecy can create a lot of internal stress and isolation.
You Get Defensive When It's Brought Up
If friends or family express concern do you find yourself getting angry defensive or brushing it off? This can be a natural reaction when you feel misunderstood or when a sensitive spot is touched. But sometimes those closest to us see things we can't or aren't ready to admit.
What Now? Taking the First Gentle Step
If you nodded along to several of these points please know you’re not alone. So many of us have walked this path or are currently on it. Recognizing these signs isn't about labeling yourself; it’s about understanding what’s happening so you can start to make a change.
Here are a few gentle first steps you might consider:
- Talk to someone you trust: This could be a close friend a family member or a spiritual advisor. Voicing your struggles can be incredibly freeing. For me opening up to trusted people in my church community was a huge help.
- Consider professional help: Therapists counselors and doctors specializing in addiction can offer guidance support and treatment options. There's no shame in seeking expert help; it's a sign of strength.
- Be kind to yourself: This journey isn't easy. There will be good days and tough days. Self-compassion is key. Remember how I mentioned my faith journey? Learning to see myself through a lens of God's grace and forgiveness was transformative. It helped me be gentler with myself during the process of change.
- Start small: You don’t have to overhaul your entire life overnight. When I was tackling my unhealthy habits and weight I focused on small wins. Maybe it’s one less gaming session one healthier meal or reaching out to one person. These small victories build momentum.
Change is a process a journey. It took time for these habits to form and it will take time to build new healthier ones. For me building a productive routine even with short bursts of deep work (just 2-4 hours a day) and practicing daily gratitude helped shift my focus and build a more positive existence. My growing faith also provided a bedrock of strength and purpose that I lean on daily.
If this article has stirred something in you perhaps the first step is simply to sit with that feeling. Acknowledge it. What’s one sign that resonated most deeply with you today? And what’s one tiny thing you could do maybe even just think about doing differently tomorrow?
You have more strength than you know. And remember you don't have to walk this path alone.
