Ever feel stuck standing at a crossroads, completely paralyzed by a decision?
I know that feeling all too well. For years, my life was a string of bad decisions. One more hour of gaming instead of sleep. One more slice of pizza when I was already full. One more excuse to skip a workout. These choices felt small in the moment but they added up, leaving me overweight, unhealthy, and feeling lost.
Making good decisions felt like a superpower I just didn't have. But it’s not a superpower. It’s a skill. And like any skill, you can learn it and get better with practice. I had to learn the hard way, but these are the strategies that helped me turn everything around. I hope they can help you too.
1. Hit the Pause Button
Our first instinct is often to react immediately. Impulse is a powerful force. It’s what led me to countless nights of binge eating or mindless scrolling. The single most effective tool I found was the simple act of pausing.
When a decision comes up, especially an emotional one, just stop. Take a few deep breaths. Walk into another room. Give yourself 60 seconds before you say yes or no. This tiny gap between a trigger and your response is where control lives. It gives your rational mind a chance to catch up with your emotions.
2. Zoom Out for the Big Picture
It's easy to get lost in the details of a decision. "Should I take this job or that one?" "Should I move or stay?" In these moments, I zoom out. I ask myself: "Which choice aligns better with the person I want to be in five years?"
This question cuts through the noise. It forces you to connect your daily choices to your long-term values and goals. A little short-term discomfort is often worth it if it moves you closer to a life of purpose.
3. Define the Real Problem
Sometimes we stress over a decision because we're not even solving the right problem. I used to agonize over what to eat for dinner. The real problem wasn't the menu. The real problem was that I was using food to cope with boredom and stress.
Once I identified the real problem, the decision wasn't "pizza or salad?" anymore. It became "how can I deal with my stress in a healthy way?" That's a much more powerful question to answer.
4. Limit Your Choices
Have you ever stared at a restaurant menu with 200 items and felt totally overwhelmed? It’s called decision fatigue. Too many options can be just as paralyzing as too few.
When you can, intentionally limit your choices. For my meals, I decided to choose from just a handful of healthy options I enjoyed. For my work, I focus on only two or three key tasks each day. By reducing the number of decisions you have to make, you save your mental energy for the ones that truly matter.
5. Ask Your Future Self
This is a mental trick I use all the time. When I’m tempted to slip back into an old, lazy habit, I imagine myself tomorrow morning. How will "Future Me" feel about this choice?
Will he be proud and energized because I went for a walk? Or will he be sluggish and regretful because I stayed up late playing games? Thinking about the future consequences, even just 12 hours ahead, makes the right choice today much clearer. It’s how I lost over 110 pounds—one forward-thinking decision at a time.
6. Seek Wise Counsel
You don’t have to make big decisions alone. We are not meant to navigate life in isolation. Talk to people you trust and respect—a close friend, a family member, or a mentor.
For me, talking to my spiritual father has been essential. He doesn't give me the answers. Instead, he helps me see the situation from a different perspective, one that is grounded in faith and wisdom. He asks questions that force me to think more deeply. Find someone in your life who can do that for you.
7. Pray for Clarity
When I feel completely lost, I turn to prayer. This isn’t about asking God for a magic sign or to make the decision for me. It’s about quieting the noise in my own head and heart so I can listen.
Prayer helps me surrender my anxiety and my need to control everything. I simply ask God for wisdom, clarity, and peace. I pray that my decision will align with His will for my life. Often, after spending time in quiet prayer, the path forward feels less confusing and my heart feels more at peace with a certain direction.
8. Start with the Smallest Step
Big decisions are terrifying because they feel so permanent and huge. "Get healthy" is a massive, daunting goal. But what's the smallest possible step? It could be drinking a glass of water instead of soda. Or walking for 10 minutes.
I didn't lose 110 pounds with one giant decision. I lost it with thousands of small ones. Celebrate those small wins. Each tiny, positive choice builds momentum and proves to yourself that you can do it.
9. Listen to Your Conscience
We all have that inner voice. That quiet nudge that tells us when something feels right or wrong. I believe that’s our conscience, a gift from God to help guide us.
In the past, I was an expert at ignoring it. I would rationalize my bad habits and push that feeling down. Now, I try to pay attention. If a decision leaves me feeling uneasy or conflicted inside, I take that as a serious warning sign. Your conscience is a powerful moral compass. Learn to trust it.
10. Review, Don't Regret
You will make bad decisions. I still do. It’s part of being human. The goal isn’t perfection. The goal is progress.
When you make a choice that doesn't work out, don’t spiral into regret and self-criticism. That’s a dead end. Instead, review the decision with curiosity. What went wrong? What can I learn from this? What will I do differently next time? Every mistake is a lesson if you choose to see it that way. It’s an opportunity to grow in wisdom and humility.
Making better decisions is a journey, not a destination. It’s about being a little more intentional and a little more thoughtful each day. You have it in you to change your life, one choice at a time.
So, what’s one small decision you're facing today? Pick one of these strategies and just try it. You might be surprised at how much clearer the path becomes.
