We’ve all been there – that moment when plans fall apart or circumstances turn against us. So, what to do when things don’t go your way? Do you stay stuck, or give up? Or are there ways to move forward? Let’s find some solutions.
I’ve had many moments in my life when things didn’t pan out as I was hoping, and I’m sure that’s happened to you before (unfortunately). Even recently when one of my websites got hit pretty hard by a recent Google update and killed their progress.
So what did I do?
Well, at first I was disappointed and angry, then I started looking for causes, after that, I did some research and saw that others were going through the same thing and realized maybe it’s not all my fault… and after a couple of days/weeks, I finally let go.
I just accepted that those projects were now kinda dead… and so the only thing left for me to do was to start again and move to better things.
But is this the solution to everything when things aren’t going our way?
Well, it’s not so simple… you can’t just quit a relationship, stop talking to your family or friends over a silly argument, or fight for something that’s not even worth it in the end.
In my family, for years there have been fights about some pieces of land (basic Balkan stuff… 😂).
I always kinda laughed about it because in the end it doesn’t even matter and the land just sits there not even getting used. But is that worth not talking to family members?
No of course not.
We have to remember that when we die and leave this earth we leave with nothing, just as we got put on this earth by God, that’s how we are going to go away. All these material possessions mean nothing in the end. A good read for this is our Parable of the Rich Fool article.
Sometimes of course it’s not about materialistic stuff, it could be work or health-related, maybe you wished for a promotion and you didn’t get it or you hoped for something new to come around and fix your health problem but alas it didn’t happen.
While it’s difficult, we still have to learn how to cope with it and manage it and continue striving and moving on with life, otherwise, we don’t fix anything anyway.
Ok, so now I’m hearing you asking:
Ok Stephen, enough with your stories, what do we actually do when we are in a situation where nothing goes as planned?
Well, I’m no expert, but sure, here are some tips that might help you out (they aren’t perfect or tailored for everyone so pick what you think will work best for you).
Acknowledge and Process Your Emotions
Listen, when stuff goes haywire, it’s gonna throw you for a loop emotionally.
Don’t try to pretend you’re okay – feeling disappointed, frustrated, even downright mad, that’s all normal.
The important thing is to give yourself space to feel those feelings, ya know?
Journaling can be a good outlet, or sometimes just talking it out with someone you trust can make a huge difference.
Reframe Your Thinking
It’s so easy to get stuck in that negative headspace after a setback, I get it. But try to challenge those downer thoughts and look for even a little bit of positive. Here’s where a list can help:
- Did you learn something, even if it was the hard way?
- Did it maybe show you that you’re stronger than you thought?
- Could it end up leading you to something even better down the road?
Practice Self-Care
When I’m feeling stressed out, I gotta remember to take care of myself.
That means finding stuff that calms me down, like breathing exercises, a walk in the park, or simply praying.
And honestly, sometimes you just need a break to do something fun – read a book, get out in nature, whatever makes you happy.
Don’t underestimate the power of sleep, good food, and a bit of exercise either!
Focus on What You Can Control
Look, there’s gonna be times when stuff is just outta your hands, and that sucks.
But instead of getting stuck on what you can’t change, put that energy into what you can do.
Figure out the situation, try to come up with solutions, a plan B, whatever it takes.
And keepin’ a positive attitude, even when it feels impossible, can go a long way.
Additional tips
If the above methods and tips weren’t enough (and I mean… of course, they can’t all be relatable to you), then feel free to check out these extra things you can do when things don’t go your way:
- Find solace in prayer: If you are a religious person, prayer can provide comfort and strength during challenging times. It can be a way to release feelings, connect with God, and seek guidance or a sense of peace.
- Practice gratitude: Take some time each day to appreciate the good things in your life, even when things are tough.
- Seek professional help: If you’re struggling to cope on your own, don’t hesitate to seek professional help from a therapist or counselor.
I know how frustrating setbacks can be. But I’ve learned that these coping mechanisms can make a huge difference. If I can learn to handle challenges better, you can too!
I hope this article helps, and you find some good tips in here that you can apply and start to turn things around.
Don’t stress too much about it, even if now it sucks, eventually, it will have to get better… that’s how life is, with ups and downs.
Don’t believe all the fake social media stuff, everyone has bad days and things that go wrong, but most of people don’t post them online. So yeah, take those social media posts with a grain of salt, or even better, take a break from all of the networks and do a digital detox.
